By Debbie Mulligan
Congratulations! Today is your day
You’re off to great places, you’re off and away! (Seuss, Dr.; 1990)
Finally! How hard can it be
It’s about time and IT’S ALL ABOUT ME! (Mulligan, Dr.; 2030)
I’ve sweated and practised and sweated some more
If all else fails I’ve got cartoons galore
And a dvd with old men on bikes
I just hope it starts when it’s s’posed to- Yikes
I know, I’ll win them over with chocolate called Roses
And just for good luck, I’ll throw in some poses
The panel walks in and they all take a seat
I feel like they are the diners and I’m the cooked meat
Oh well, here we go, it’s now or never
Now is the moment to show them I’m clever
I deliver my speech and sit down with a sigh
Really Deborah, sit up straight, this is no time to cry
“I notice on page 10 you’ve used the word which…”
It’s then that I develop an unforeseen twitch
“Errrrrrrr, ummmmmm,” I mutter, stalling for time
How can they look at me like it’s such a big crime
No one told me this would be the longest hour of the day
My desperate thoughts start rambling and my mind starts to stray
I look around the room and my supervisor is nodding
Willing me onwards as my words just keep plodding
“The end,” says the chairman and graciously smiles
“The end,” says my battered psyche like it’s run 1000 miles
Thank heavens it’s over, I’m home on my bed
I’ve taken some Panadol for my poor aching head
Some chocolate and red wine are on the agenda
This could be the beginning of a very long bender………….
And then the next day my peers gather round for a report
I feel blessed and I’m grateful for all their support
This doctoral road is tricky, fraught with bends and dead ends
But it’s made just that bit easier with my new found friends.